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I Went To A Texas Jail To Roast The Inmates; Here's What I Learned About Incarceration In America

Discussion in 'Rough' started by Buffalo, Jun 14, 2015.

  1. Buffalo

    Buffalo The Thinking Hat

    Dec 23, 2011
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    #1 Buffalo, Jun 14, 2015
    Last edited: Jun 14, 2015
    • Like Like x 1
  2. SneakyDave

    SneakyDave Solid Mean
    Staff Member

    Dec 8, 2011
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    I was reading about this and some of his jokes. Pretty funny. I've seen him on some celebrity roasts, pretty brutal.

    — [To a youthful-looking inmate] "You're one of those rare people who looks like a child and a child molester at the same time."

    — [To a group of white supremacists in the audience] "We got the whites-only section up there. Happy Hanukkah, fellas."

    — [On his own questionable behavior] "I've drank and driven a car, I've lied on my taxes, I shot Suge Knight."

    — [Pointing to the mushy, unappetizing food] "We got Bill Cosby's rape baby over here."

    — [To an older-looking inmate who has been in prison for a month] "A month? Looks like you've been in here sinceShawshank times. I'd say turn your life around, but you look like you have 30 days left to live, shit."

    — [On paying one's debt to society] "An eye for an eye a tooth for a tooth. Some of you look like you've given more than others."

    — "The good thing about a jail show is, nobody gets up and walks out."

    — "Frank, you look like what happens when the morning-after pill kind of works."

    — [At the women's prison] "One guy, 50 female prisoners. This is like the first scene of every porno I've ever seen. I should be delivering a pizza right now."

    — "Wait, are you guys laughing extra loud because somebody's trying to build a tunnel right now?"

    Jeff Ross Roasts Criminals aired Saturday at 11 p.m. on Comedy Central.

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